Sunday, November 8, 2015

Give Thanks for Roller Derby

Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

As we near the end of our roller derby season, we’d like to reflect on how grateful we are for roller derby. We come together a few days each week to practice, have bouts, have meetings and just to hang out. 

This is what we look like on any given Sunday... we're thankful we get to play rough and have fun
Mischief Managed, Whip O SnapHer, Kam N. GetIt, and Betty Switch
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

We’re also thankful for the back massages!

We’re thankful for all the incredible coaching and training
Grandmaster Bash
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

We're oh so thankful for our awesome refs,
and the secret Freddy selfies, Mwahahaha!
Jasper Newton and Freddy Mercury Poisoning

And of course, for all of our fantabulous volunteers!
Gina Allen xx factor
Photo courtesy of Joshua R. Craig Photography

And seriously, where would we be without our fans?!?!
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

We’ve made some really amazing friendships and been to some very cool places...
let's not forget the fun we had getting there!!!

Not to mention all the other very awesome teams we've played, even one from Norway!
Buster Vicious, Hitter Miss and Nidaros Roller Derby girls
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

We are thankful for all our seasoned vets, transfer skaters, and fresh meat
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

For mothers and daughters that play derby together...
and here, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree with both of them in the box! Bad girls!
Sheeza Pistol #138 and Baby Pistol #38
Photo courtesy of Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC

For our sponsors and vendors

For the pets that frequently come to the warehouse so we can give some fur baby lovin’

And for all the little people who are part of this roller derby family. On any given day, they can bring a smile to our faces even if we’ve been hit on the track one too many times. Got a busted lip, swollen knee, rink rash? Just look at this guy, and he’ll put a smile on your face! He may even play Roll the Skate with you.

And for teamwork, whether it's on the track, off the track, or setting up and breaking down the track!
Tesla Spoils and her helper

And last but not least, we are thankful for our talent... I mean, who else can do a rainbow split besides Rainbow Blight? Right?

I hope you are thankful for derby, because we sure are! Come to the last bout of the season at 1pm on November 14th and be thankful with us!

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

It's a Thriller double header!
Oct 3, 2015
Greensboro Counterstike vs Star City Roller Girls
The Smooth Criminals vs The PYTs
Yes, it's those notorious criminals vs those pretty young things. This should be interesting! 
Come sing one of your all time favorite songs Thriller, but in slightly different lyrics...

Thriller Lyrics. Oh, no! I mean...

Roller Derby Thriller Lyrics!

It’s close to bout time and something evil’s lurking on the track
Under the gym lights, you see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to skate but terror takes the track before you get there
You start to freeze as blockers looks you right between the eyes
You’re recognized

‘Cause this is thriller derby night
And no one’s gonna save you from the blocker about to hit
You know it’s thriller derby night
You’re fighting for the jam, so just go get her
Derby tonight

You hear the whistle and realize there ain’t no turnin' back
You try to bust through the four beast blocker wall in front of you
You close your eyes and hope you end up on the other side
But all the while the other jammer’s skatin’ up behind
You better run

‘Cause this is thriller derby night
There ain’t no second chance against the blockers evil eyes
Girl, thriller derby night
You’re fighting for the jam, so just go get her
Derby tonight

Players stop brawling
And teams start to drink up their Gatorade
There’s no resisting the pitch a pony this time
Now it’s the end of half time

They’re out to get you; there’s blockers closing in on every side
They will hip check you unless you pass that pantie on your head
Now is the time to end this jam and score some points to win this
All through the bout keep pushin’ through those blockers til they fall
You’ll score the points

‘Cause this is thriller derby night
Your team can win this bout if you work together and you fight
Thriller derby night
You’re fighting for the jam so be that thriller killer jammer
Derby here tonight

‘Cause this is thriller derby night
Your team can win this bout if you work together and you fight
Thriller derby night
You’re fighting for the jam so be that thriller killer

I’m gonna derby tonight!

Monday, March 23, 2015

Five ways being a roller derby fan can improve your life

Did you know that there are scientists out there researching sports fans? Yeah. And they've actually found some ways that being a sports fan can contribute to good health. What?! Yeah. So it’s March, admit it, you've already broken your resolutions to be healthier this year at least 20 times. Let me help you with an easier way to health and happiness: just come watch some roller derby. 

1. Watching roller derby will increase your mental capacity.

If you’re already a fan of roller derby, congratulations! You’re obviously very smart. You've made good decisions in life. But being a roller derby fan can actually help keep your brain in shape. Watching sports forces your brain to process a lot of information very quickly. When you first watch roller derby you probably don’t realize everything that’s going on. Everything happens fast. You can blink and miss an incredible block that forces the jammer to cut the track and get a penalty or a jammer landing an apex jump to score four points and call it off (so no blinking allowed!). Watching roller derby is essentially a workout for your brain, and the longer you're a fan the more you’ll notice strategic blocks and know when the jammer needs to call it off. The more derby you watch the more interesting it becomes and the smarter you will be.

2. Watching roller derby can improve your sex life.

So we all know that physical activity promotes testosterone production, right? Well researchers have now found that even just the act of watching sports can also increase testosterone levels. Why is that good? Increased testosterone equals increased wanna-sex-you-up-ness. This goes for the boys and the girls. So come watch some roller derby and then go home and celebrate that win in the best way possible! I’m just trying to get you laid, Boo.

3. Watching roller derby decreases loneliness and depression.

Being a fan makes you part of a family. Probably a very weird and dysfunctional family but that’s okay! We are not meant to be alone but it’s way too easy to become isolated these days. I’m blaming you, internet! Shared love for a team bonds you together with tons of awesome people you wouldn't have otherwise met. Fans create a community which helps to fight away the blues.

4. Watching roller derby can help improve your relationship.

Yeah, we’re saving marriages here!! Okay, maybe not. But bringing your bae to watch roller derby can bring you closer together. Studies have shown that couples who watch sports together are more satisfied with their relationship. Sharing the trials and triumphs of your favorite team is great way to bond with your partner. And don’t forget about the sex. That’s not going to hurt your relationship either. So mark your calendars to make bout night date night. Trust me, your partner will thank you.

5. Watching roller derby will get you ready for bikini season.

Come to a bout and you’ll see all types of beautiful bodies kicking ass. We've got tall girls and short girls, skinny girls and curvy girls but they all have one thing in common. They’re strong, fearless women and that’s sexy as hell. There’s a lot of negative crap out there but we hope when you look at us you’ll be reminded that you’re gorgeous and powerful and sexy just how you are!

So do your body a favor, pick up a 2015 Season Pass or tickets to our season opener on March 28th and come watch us play! 

Monday, November 24, 2014

Happy Turkey Day!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! In honor of this gobble gobble holiday, we have put together some of our favorite.... turkeys from the fall season. Please vote for your favorite in the comments! We would love to hear from you! All images in this post are shot by our lovely sponsors Frayed Edge Concepts, LLC.

1. Turkey Sandwich

2. The Flying Turkey

3. The Singing Turkeys

4. Lowblocking Turkeys

5. The WTF Just Happened Turkey

6. The Kicking Turkey

7. The Turkey Punch

8. The Aggressive Turkey
9. Turkey Love

Monday, November 10, 2014

Thanksgiving Throwdown

Our THANKSGIVING THROWDOWN is happening on Saturday, Saturday, Saturday!  This double-header is your last chance to see roller derby in 2014, and it's sure to be a night you'll want to mention in your family holiday letter.  The Coliseum Pavilion doors will open at 5 to give you plenty of time to check out our Merch table and other vendors, grab a snack, and snag a great seat before team intros and the national anthem.  

At 6pm your magnificent Gate City All-Stars go up against the Little City Roller Girls who will be visiting our fair city all the way from Johnson City, Tennessee.  Gate City has had an incredible season, beating higher-ranked teams in the the last two bouts.  Come see whether they can lay the smack down yet again!

Then, at 7:30, our Greensboro Counterstrike will take on the G.I. Janes from Mount Holly, NC.  The Janes are a fairly new league, just formed last year.  As you know, Counterstrike is in its inaugural season.  These two new teams both want this win and they are well-matched.  Who will come out on top?

We support a local charity or non-profit at every bout.  This time a portion of our proceeds will go to Ruff Love Rescue, a non-profit no-kill dog rescue and foster care organization dedicated to the care of abused, neglected and abandoned dogs.  This weekend is your chance to support local roller derby AND local dogs in need, all while having fun with friends.  

Tickets at the door are $10 ($8 for military/senior/student, $5 for kids ages 8-12) but I know you're dying to buy your tickets RIGHT NOW.  And guess what!  You can do that and you'll even save some money!  We sell tickets online at  Or, if you're lucky enough to know a roller girl personally, she'll be happy to hook you up.

Here are a couple other exciting things: This bout will be the first ever for Daisy Chainsaw, #1953.  Look for her kickin' booty and takin' names in the Counterstrike v. G.I. Janes game!  And remember Johnny Appleseed, one of your favorite Battleground Betties?  The Throwdown will be her first bout with Counterstrike.  Don't miss her feisty hits!

Awwwww, guys.... you're going to miss us so much over the holidays!  You'll be so sad you might not even be able to enjoy your turkey and presents and family togetherness time.  So be sure to join us this weekend and get your fill of speedy, skillful, hard-hitting derby excitement.  It's all in the name of end-of-year joy.  See you Saturday!

Monday, October 20, 2014

Hot patootie, bless my soul! It's GSORD's fifth annual Halloween Doubleheader!

Oh, I just love success!
I said, hey listen to me.  Stay sane inside insanity THIS SATURDAY, October 25, as you scream and shiver for your local teams at our Halloween roller derby double feature!  In case you hadn't noticed, we've got the most titillating theme of all this year: The Rocky Horror Picture Show. And you know what that means: doing The Time Warp!  Start practicing now! 

Our first bout, starting at 6pm, will feature your Gate City All Stars fighting those beasts from the east, the Cape Fear Roller Girls.  You saw Gate City take down Charlotte last month- can they repeat the performance?

In our second bout, starting at 7:30pm, Greensboro Counterstrike goes up against the tough and tricky Carolina Bootleggers.  CounterStrike is hungry for their first win of the season- will this be it?

Don't worry, the games aren't going to be held at some kind of hunting lodge for rich weirdos.  We'll be at the Coliseum Pavilion. Doors open at 5, so come on down early to get a good seat and get pumped for a night of absolute pleasure family-friendly fun!  Get a trial run on that halloween getup you've been working on- we'll have costume contests for both kids and adults, with prizes for winners and candy for participants!

You can always buy tickets at the door, or you can save yourself a couple of bucks and get advance tickets online at or from your favorite roller girl.  Stay up-to-date with all the bout day info by joining our handy-dandy facebook event.

This past weekend we also held a Rocky Horror Dance Party at Westerwood tavern.  Sass Squasher and Hitter Miss got into the spirit of the floor show with Flirtini's beeeeeeautiful red boa.  Because nothing subtly says Rocky Horror like a boa.

That's a nice look for you, Sass.
So fast she's even blurry when she's not skating.

The adorably sweet and innocent Johnny Applespeed won the costume contest at said dance party in her impeccable Janet costume.  Don't be fooled by the cuteness, though- she's a demon on the track!

See you Saturday! And remember...

Monday, October 6, 2014

Assessments results

The fresh meat group before assessments. Image by Melanie Bryan

Pre-assessment talk by head of training, Hooker
Yesterday we had our fresh meat assessments! We had seven girls go straight through and four more that we hope will pass their last phase in a couple of weeks. Assessments are a stressful time for new skaters. Keep in mind that many of these skaters have never done athletics at this level before. These skaters have been with us in GSORD since the middle of July, and in that time have practiced and perfected new skills that will put them on the track to becoming competitive derby players. For some skaters, this has been an easier journey (though never easy!) and for some, an almost insurmountable task. The skills they have had to learn range between standing on one foot to doing 25 laps around the track in 5 minutes and jumping over an object 6 inches in height (the dreaded red foam roller!). We have all seen them struggle, work incredibly hard, and shed many tears. We all know how it was like, and we have done our best to help them on their journey. We are honored to have such fighters join our league. If you are interested in joining our next group of fresh meat, please email for more information. 

Height is a matter...
of perspectives!

J.B. Groans

This fresh meat cycle was a little different than previous ones. We had a male skater go through the entire fresh meat with us. He is one of our new referees, and in order to become one with the league and further his own skating skills, he decided to participate in the entire fresh meat training! This is quite unusual, but worked really well. He also passed assessments yesterday. Beyond skating with our regular fresh meat, he has also been attending special sessions with our current head referee, Freddy Mercury Poisoning, in order to learn the ref-side of things. We are happy to welcome J.B. Groans to our team of zebras! If you are interested in joining as a referee, you also need to contact the membership chair at the above email address. Refs can be male or female, over the age of 18 and does not have to pay dues! You are expected to come to practice and help out at scrimmages and bouts. 

Hailstorm Trooper

We also have three returning skaters! Johnny Applespeed, Crash Bandicutie and Daisy Chain-Saw have all returned to the league and we are very excited to have them back. We are hoping to see all three of them bouting with Greensboro Counterstrike in our November bout! However, this is not all! We have a transfer skater named Hailstorm Trooper who will also be skating with Greensboro Counterstrike! You will be able to see her in our Oct. 25th bout with #48 (we miss you A-Ha!). 

Speaking of the next bout….. It's astounding… Time is fleeting… Madness takes its toll... But listen closely... Not for very much longer... I've got to keep control. I remember doing the Time Warp. Drinking those moments when… the blackness would hit me…. And the void would be calling… Let's do the Time Warp again…. Let's do the Time Warp again!

On Oct. 25th we are putting on a Rocky Horror Picture Show themed bout! Check out the awesome poster made by Edward Fields! Come dressed in your finest Halloween/Rocky Horror costume and win some sweet prices! It will be at the Coliseum as usual, doors opening at 5. It is a double-header, with Gate City All-Stars playing the Cape Fear Roller Girls and Greensboro Counterstrike playing the Carolina Bootleggers.  Tickets are available at Brown Paper Tickets, from your favorite roller girls and at the door! We hope to see you there!