I will admit: I have not been the best girlfriend. I have forgotten birthdays, missed important events, said nasty things I can not take back. I have written rude emails, asked too many questions, and tested trust. I have rolled my eyes, taken things for granted, and made impossible demands. I have not shown up, made threats to leave, been too arrogant, too unforgiving, too harsh.
But they always take me back.
My derby league has never faltered, never pushed me away, and has always had an open door for me to walk through-sometimes with my tail between my skates. My league has held me close, overlooked my flaws, and supported my growth as a person. My league does not love me because it is easy-they love me all the time for exactly who I am.
Miller Lightnin' with 2012 Nightmare cocaptian, Emma Ture
Photo by Frayed Edge Concepts
I do not know what other people's experiences are with their derby leagues. But I do know my own has been an adventure full of love, frustration, joy, and heartbreak. Teammates have moved, or quit, or gotten hurt. Promises have been broken, people we love have been laid to rest. There has been triumph too - mended hearts, wedding bells, healed bones. There has been no plan we have not had to adjust, or rule we have not had to break. Somehow, though, we always stick together through everything even when we can not always stick around.
So, with all things there can be a new promise, a fresh start, a fresh commitment. This season I vow to be the best girlfriend to my league that I can be. I want to be honest and steadfast, a role model for new teammates, a constant for old. I want to show up, show strong, show no mercy (well, on the track...). I want to be humble and strong, wise and kind, loyal and true. I want to be to help my league grow, and I want to grow myself. I want to be grateful for the love this league gives so easily. This will be a challenge, one that I know my league mates will take with me.
Somehow I know, that even if I fail, they will still be beside me.
In love and derby,Miller Lightnin'